imby has indicated that this thread is about Thailand
I am going to send my thoughts in a PM.
Hello Imby
Living here for more than 20 years and you being new to Thai culture there are things you should know about a Thai western relationship. My article on Romance and dating Thai style has been published in many magazines, blogs and Thai dating web sites.
This article is mainly for the guys. Ladies will learn a lot of what and what not to do in public and Thai- Western relationships.
The first thing to remember is that girls can touch the guys, but the guys CANNOT touch the girls, so if you are walking down the street, DO NOT hold hands. It is okay for the lady to put her arm and hand around the man's arm, but that's about as far as it should go.
There is a reason for this. If a girl lets a man touch, hold hands, or put his arm around her, the Thais believe the girl is easy, lose, or maybe a prostitute. If you look at the way girls act in the bars, it is easy to understand that any traditional, well-educated Thai girl would not want to be seen as such a person. Thailand is a class society, and the girls working in the bars are part of the lower class. Any well-educated and successful Thai man knows this and would not think of marring a girl of this status. Girls who work in bars are for having fun in the short term, and that is as far as it goes. Both Thai men and women know this, but for some strange reason, many male visitors to Thailand just don't get it. I will get back to this subject later.
Meeting Friends of the Opposite Gender.
First of all, you have to have time and lots of it. The best place to meet someone is where she works (not a bar). There are plenty of nice, well-educated traditional Thai girls working in restaurants, shopping malls, as tour guides, and hotels. This is excellent, as they have a product to sell you and you want to buy. This breaks the ice so you can have a conversation about something you both have in common. Be polite and look sharp (no T-shirt and shorts). If she is working in a restaurant, order your food, or in a shop, make a purchase and hang around a little while. Don't ask any personal questions at this stage, just small talk. If she is interested in you, she will ask the questions for sure.
Now wait a day or so and then return. Tell her you were just passing by and wanted to stop and visit for a while. Engage in small talk again and answer her questions. Take your time and stick around a while. She now knows you are interested in her, so the questions will start coming that are more personal. You can now ask a few small personal questions, such as how many people are in her family, where she is from, where she went to school, etc., but not too many at this stage. When it is time to leave, give her a nice big smile and look into her eyes as you walk away.
Return again in a day or two. Engage again in a little small talk and then ask if she would like to enjoy a meal with you at her convenience at any place she chooses. She might say yes or she might say no. If she says no, she wants to see if you will return again or just never come back. Don't worry, she will say yes sooner or later, so just be patient.
This should help.
Allthai
I am a mature man visiting Thailand for the first time and am interested in meeting a beautiful young woman for companionship, guide to Thailand and possible intimacy. The bar scene will probably not be for me. I have heard of ways to meet young women and their families, e.g., frequent a restaurant, but would like to hear from others who have had success in this area. What do I know about life? Tons. Am not seeking 'true love' in the romantic sense. Am not starry eyed or rose colored glassed. I am smart, compassionate, am told I am wise in the ways of the world.
How would you know that a "lady" you meet in a restaurant or mall isn't just a bargirl on a day off? You wouldn't know because bargirls don't walk around with big signs on them! Upper class, educated, Thai ladies wouldn't have much to do with an ordinary foreigner anyway. Normal, professional, Thai women sometimes will not even give you the time of day!
Girls that work in bars were not born "bargirls" they are there because a husband or boyfriend left them with a child to support or their parents need the money to support the family farm. Working in a rice field 12 hours all day long does not pay much. Working in a beer bar gives them more money to support their families. Not all of these ladies will even go to a hotel with a guy they meet in a bar. Many of these ladies have had fewer lovers than your mother, sister or previous girlfriends or even an ex wife!
If you want a companion for your time in Thailand visit a beer bar (not go-go bars or nightclubs) and make your offer. But the best advice you can get will be from another expat face-to-face. Go-go bars and nightclubs will cost too much anyway. A beer bar is a bar that does not have entertainment and is usually open to the air. Go to Pattaya and forget about any apprehension about entering a bar. You won't be the only tourist, male or female, sitting at a bar! Pattaya is cheaper than Bangkok for hotels, entertainment and even transportation, etc.
Never forget that when you are a foreign visitor to Thailand you will be considered rich by many Thais! This is because you are able to travel, pay the expensive plane ticket and pay for hotels and eat in restaurants and you are there! Advice from a local, in place, expat will be invaluable in saving you lots of money. Never fully trust anyone you travel with. Use security boxes for you cash, don't allow a stranger, Thai or foreigner, to see your ATM pin numbers!!!! Never leave your wallet out on the dresser, with cell phone, passport alone with a stranger while you take a shower or go to a Seven Eleven store, everything may be gone when you come back in the room! Lock up your stuff in the room safe if you have one or at least in your suitcase or bag.
When you go back home and boast about your good time in Thailand you can lie and tell everyone the girl you met came from a good family and never worked in a bar - who would know anyway? Tell them she worked in the nearby Seven Eleven or you met her on a bus or in a restaurant, etc. What happens in Thailand stays in Thailand - just like Las Vegas!
Up to you! (Frequented quoted in Thai bars.)
[ 17-Sep-2010, at 05:29 by karazyal ]
0 Response to "Finding female companionship in Thailand away from bar scene"
Post a Comment